I have the pleasure of being able to teach nursing students throughout the year, during which I don't think the students realize how much they teach me throughout the course of 5 weeks. One day during this rotation the students experienced the unexpected death of a patient. They stood against the wall of the room watching the nurses, eyes wide, and some filled with tears. We left the room to debrief where I learned that that was the first experience of death for many of them.
In this moment there are lots of feelings. Why did this happen? Why him? What did we do wrong? People in the ICU with 10 different lines and tubes are often expected to pass, but not the person who was sitting there talking to you 10 minutes before. Justified, confused feelings and sadness.
As nurses a lot of times we struggle with the one thing in the day that didn't go right. The one patient you advocated for so hard who gets up and leaves AMA, the one who you sat and educated who at the end tells you they don't care and aren't going to change their lifestyle or help themselves, or the patient who takes out all their frustration by verbally shooting down your confidence to the point where all you can do is walk away so they don't see you break down and cry.
This is why we work 3 days a week. Long shifts, but shifts that involve giving our heart and soul into the treatment of each patient who walks in the door.
I told the students, these days happen. These days happen and we learn from them in so many ways. How do you react to this situation? What feelings does it trigger? Reflect on these things, feel them, and develop a strategy to move forward when you see this again. How do you center yourself after you've been rattled?
You have to remember the wins of each day and let go of the situations that bring you down. Remember the one patient who said thank you, the one patient that made you smile, the one patient who was so grateful that you took the time to sit and listen. Those are the wins of each day.
Each and every day you walk into a patient room, give life. Bring something into that room that brightens that persons day. A happy heart, a smile, intentional interaction even if you're only there for five minutes. Whether they take it or not, at the end of the day you can leave knowing that you have given your all. You are proud of your care, proud of who you are as a nurse, and did your best to bring light, joy, and healing.
We like to think we have control in this profession. We don't, but we do have control over how we respond to situations and the attitude we carry every day.
So whatever you do, whatever profession you practice, practice giving life with each interaction. You'd be surprised at the difference you will make.
